In which I write a list of ideas that I will never get around to.
I may procrastinate over writing, but one part of blogging I am quite good at is making notes and drafts. Anytime I have a good idea for a three hundred word missive I jot it down, and for the majority of the time when I have a terrible idea I also make a note.
There was a point when I thought I would be all creative and write in a Moleskine notebook, but that fell by the wayside. I would spend so long looking for a pen and piece of paper that I had forgotten by the time I came to scrawl it down.
So going through my ideas and drafts I have the following list of post ideas:
Continue reading “Short on content not ideas”
In which I use data to not prove very much.
Suggesting I look at my blog stats feels a little too much like work. As in real work, because my real job is as a Digital Analyst. I sit looking at pageviews and transaction funnels all day so when it comes to my own site I am quite unconcerned by it’s numbers.
My most visited post is (unknown or deleted), I have no recollection of what it was called or what it was about. I blame the post pruning I did at the Red Posting where I deleted 400-odd posts. Don’t worry they will be back, I’m just editing them and reposting them to a new audience.
This got me looking at the other popular posts on the site, could they give me any special input into what drives visitors to read some of my rants? Is there a trend that suggests I should write more about my lunch or focus on lists? What do my top posts tell me about this site and those who take the time to read it?
Continue reading “I said hey, what’s going on”
In which I know my Blogging-Topic from my Blogging-Subject.
“A room without books is like a body without a soul.”
— Marcus Tullius Cicero
I consider myself to have a larger than median book collection (a rough estimate says between 500-600 books), it fills 3 1/2 large Billy bookcases…and part of the floor…and under the bed. I have most of the books I have ever had from childhood to the present day, in a wide range of genre and type.
Most people I know just put books on a shelf, this is just a travesty. There are systems people, systems and one specially for books, the Dewey Decimal system.
The act of curating my bookcases took a full three days, mainly due to stopping and reading but also because each one had to fit in the right place. It’s like a giant vertical jigsaw where every piece is rectangular. Fiction and non-fiction should be separate, sci-fi and fantasy beside each other but not mixed, ordered by publication date where possible (notable exceptions include having to place The Silmarillion before The Hobbit which comes before Lord of the Rings).
Books on science flow from Physics to Biology via Chemistry, history from Ancient Greece to Modern day. Sports are linked by players and nationalities, everything in order not overspilling the shelf. And this is where the problems arise.
Continue reading “I love Dewey Decimal”
In which I hit my word limit.
I have a strange fascination with three hundred, not the “This is Sparta” kind but having to type a triple century of words. For some reason I have it in my head that this is the ideal length of a blog post.
I may have got this from reading some random article that suggested anything less than this mystical figure was punishable by Google. I think it reflects the crazy notion that an obscure site in some corner of the interwebs needs SEOing to death (even though SEO is basically snake oil for the digital age).
I even have set goals for where I need to be before adding the button to:
Continue reading “Counting my three hundred words”
In which I ruminate on my failure as a novelist.
I have a continual process of checking and reposting old pieces of writing, I am constantly discovering new ways to say what I thought I had said but did not do it very clearly. Added to this it is always nice to resurrect an old post from archive oblivion.
As I was going through last winter’s posts I discovered my feeble attempt at NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month) and was embarrassed by:
This was the point in which I gave up trying to be a writer and jus to be happy as someone who wrote.
Continue reading “Writing to write”
In which I stick the kettle on.
If we were having coffee now then we would almost certainly be in a place where it was cheap and most likely awful. The reason I would be having coffee would be that, even though it was terrible, the likelihood is that the tea would be even worse. If there is one thing more horrific to an Englishman than bad coffee it is bad tea.
If we were having coffee now you would sit there with you fancyacappmahino and I would be trying to drink down a coffee hinted pint of milk with as much sugar and chocolate powder as possible. I don’t know why I think this is any better because I hate both sugary milk and chocolate milkshakes, so rather than have bad coffee-house tea I would rather drink a combination of three that I don’t like. That is how awful the tea is.
Continue reading “If we were having c̶o̶f̶f̶e̶e̶ tea now”
In which I troll the trolls of the spa comments.
Over the last week I’ve had so many lovely comments (and been extremely tardy at leaving them on others sites), and I really wanted to highlight a few…but I don’t want to play favourites. Being British I have to seek to avoid personal conflict so as not to appear rude, so rather than mention one or two (which is not possible) I would have to either mention everybody like I was a verbose Oscar winner or mention nobody at all.
So I’m taking the latter, instead I want to highlight some of the amazing comments I’ve got from people I know won’t get upset…the spambots. Thankfully I have a handle on the fake comments left, but I like to review them from time to time because they can be funnier than anything I write. The following comments are all ‘real’ as in they got posted as a comment (and then, thankfully, kicked out by WordPress) but I feel it’s time to open the spam postbag and engage with non-real people.
Continue reading “Answering my (spam) commenters”
In which I can’t move for tripping over my own shoes.
But I need more shoes…
– Mrs Geek ergo Sum, everytime we are near a shoe shop.
I don’t understand why people need a lot of shoes, Not in the “ooh you can’t have too many shoes because who knows which pair you might need to wear” but in the “you can’t have too many pairs of shoes because why do you need them all”. I have shoes that have purpose not fashion. They may be fashionably purposeful but I don’t buy a similar pair of shoes in a slightly different colour to accumulate another piece of footwear.
Each piece of cobblery I own has a job, to keep my foot adorned in a particular situation and place. If they don’t have a job then they don’t exist. I don’t have a collection of footwear that looks like this.
Continue reading “Shoes everywhere”
In which I sit down and just start typing.
Giving up the morning hassle of driving has freed up a lot more time in my life. Instead of spending two hours a day trying to find a piece of music I like (or not getting angry at the volume of adverts on chat radio) I now spend my life with the pleasure of my fellow commuters on the British rail network (…and I love it so).
Although I don’t get all 120 minutes back I do have half it, and this is fantastic for my productivity. Where I used to have to find some time to sit down and write a few hundred words (because the daily target is three hundred) now I have the perfect amount of time to sit down and tap away at a keyboard.
There is only one place to write and that is alone at a typewriter. The writer who has to go into the streets is a writer who does not know the streets. . . . when you leave your typewriter you leave your machine gun and the rats come pouring through.
— Charles Bukowski, Notes of a Dirty Old Man
Continue reading “The space to write”
In which something is only worth doing if it is hard to do.
When it comes to writing I’m full of a strange bravado, as I can hit the keys on my keyboard I feel that somehow qualifies me to be a writer. In the same way that I can swing a golf cup makes me Tiger Woods (well maybe Now-Tiger Woods not Then-Tiger Woods). This bravado is seriously misplaced because my style of writing is best described as “adequate”, and I’m happy with that because that is what I am aiming for.
It is easy to be “adequate”, play a little sports then you’ll be an “adequate” player, or maybe sketch a few pictures then you’ll be an “adequate” artist. If you only tune in a little to what your kids need then you are going to be be, if you are lucky, an “adequate” parent. If you want to be good at something though…
…that’s going to be hard.
Continue reading “Easy Writer”