Holding onto the duvet

In which I lie on the edge of the bed shivering with cold.

Following on from my amazing bed post (that is a post about beds as opposed to one of the corners) I got some grief from Mrs G because of the amount of space I claimed I needed. Being five months pregnant she is starting to claim to need extra room for her and the baby and that I should give up some of my side.

I have some very strict sleep rules, which I did explain to Mrs G before we first shared a bed and still flush with the early goggles of love she agreed. Then she found out about the “Four Positions” and requested an immediate renegotiation.

I like to sleep in a certain way and these vary from being in a tiny ball to taking up as much room as possible, may I present the Four Forms of Sleep.

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I am a night owl

In which I want to stay up late.

Of all the arguments I have with Mrs G (which are not that many) the topic of complaint that crops up most often is going to bed. We have similar tastes in food and TV, we have a set of ethics and morals that are well aligned, we like doing the same things. Get us in the bedroom though late at night and it becomes a battlezone.

The main issue is that my wanting to turn the lights off pre-11pm means that I’m not a night owl like my wife. This is patently nonsense, I’m as much a night owl as the next red-eyed fellow, as my issue with going to sleep is not related to my personal preference for a bedtime but to pure biology.

My morning alarm call is dictated by what time we need to go to work, for us this means leaving the house at 7am, so there is the whole morning routine to complete. I have tried to make it as efficient as possible by preparing the morning coffee the night before, having lunches ready and not caring what I wear and just grabbing anything from the wardrobe. To give myself that little more time I even skip breakfast until I am at my desk so I can have a few more minutes.

It still doesn’t seem enough.

I have managed to get the process down to 35 minutes, and that is both for me and The Feliciraptor to be ready (heaven knows what it will be like if we through another child in the mix). Still I don’t feel like I sleep long enough and all I’m longing for are seven hours. Continue reading “I am a night owl”

Nothing better than your own bed

In which I try to get comfortable on another mattress but miss my own spot.

Being away always means that you get to come back, well mostly but this isn’t a post about what disasters are likely to befall you whilst you are absent from home. Instead this is a post about what I miss most when I am away from home.

Of course this is easy; I miss my wife and family when I am away from them. Especially as I know this part of my post normally appears on Facebook so will earn me extra points for being all soppy. I’m hoping that the excerpt will end at “them”.

I am always sensitive around sleep, so I will always miss my bed whenever I’m not at home. Actually I can be even more specific than that. It’s not the mattress or bed frame that I pine for, it’s the pillows. The aged pieces of artificial fibres (no feathers due to my asthma) that have separated and reformed, bound together by sweat and skin cells, to fit perfectly to my head. Whenever I go and sleep elsewhere it just isn’t the same.
pillows from my bed
Continue reading “Nothing better than your own bed”

Getting up in the morning

In which I wish life was one long snooze button.

Thanks to the Northerly latitude I live at I don’t have to get up before sunrise (which this morning was at 6:20am), that’s not to say I am not awake at that time. I can still wrap my head in a pillow while Baby G makes noises and pretend that at 6.30am I have had a lie in. Come December that will all change as our closest star won’t make an appearance until gone 8am, by which time I will already be at my desk at work.

Dawn, whenever it may be always arrives in the morning but the only use for A.M. is to be asleep and not wake up. I am not designed to wake up before the sunrise (whenever that is), nor should I be woken by any loud ringing noise or external stimulus. I am a sensitive soul who should be allowed to fall asleep when I am tired and wake up when I’m not.

I’m basically a cat in human form, and would have no issues with being fed and worshiped as a God. Do you hear that Mrs G, I would have no problem at all being worshiped.
Continue reading “Getting up in the morning”