Holding onto the duvet

In which I lie on the edge of the bed shivering with cold.

Following on from my amazing bed post (that is a post about beds as opposed to one of the corners) I got some grief from Mrs G because of the amount of space I claimed I needed. Being five months pregnant she is starting to claim to need extra room for her and the baby and that I should give up some of my side.

I have some very strict sleep rules, which I did explain to Mrs G before we first shared a bed and still flush with the early goggles of love she agreed. Then she found out about the “Four Positions” and requested an immediate renegotiation.

I like to sleep in a certain way and these vary from being in a tiny ball to taking up as much room as possible, may I present the Four Forms of Sleep.

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Tired and wanting to sleep

In which I would like 25 hours sleep a day.

I ache

My shoulders are screaming with tightness and longing for a good nights sleep. It has been a while since my eyes stopped crying at my brain and my legs have become unionised and gone on strike, they have become a way to stop the torso from falling over and no longer provide any more service than that. I’m feeling really quite tired.

I’m not a clinical diagnostician (I thought diagnostician was a friend of Porthos, Aramis and the other one) but I’m pretty sure it’s not from over exertion. I would remember doing a triathlon, it’s from the classic lack of sleep. More galling it is nobody’s fault I can’t sleep well. How can I blame someone if there is no sleep thief? Continue reading “Tired and wanting to sleep”

Nothing better than your own bed

In which I try to get comfortable on another mattress but miss my own spot.

Being away always means that you get to come back, well mostly but this isn’t a post about what disasters are likely to befall you whilst you are absent from home. Instead this is a post about what I miss most when I am away from home.

Of course this is easy; I miss my wife and family when I am away from them. Especially as I know this part of my post normally appears on Facebook so will earn me extra points for being all soppy. I’m hoping that the excerpt will end at “them”.

I am always sensitive around sleep, so I will always miss my bed whenever I’m not at home. Actually I can be even more specific than that. It’s not the mattress or bed frame that I pine for, it’s the pillows. The aged pieces of artificial fibres (no feathers due to my asthma) that have separated and reformed, bound together by sweat and skin cells, to fit perfectly to my head. Whenever I go and sleep elsewhere it just isn’t the same.
pillows from my bed
Continue reading “Nothing better than your own bed”

A life in bed

In which I wish to be a bed tester when I grow up.

Apparently I am a sleeping Stradivarius, this is the opinion of Mrs G who is constantly frustrated at my crazy desire to obtain more than seven hours sleep. Given that this would be sixty minutes more a day it would only equate to losing a year and a half of awake time over the next forty years.

As an adult I currently operate on 85% of my preferred sleep time, with the rest of the day spent complaining that I am tired. Sleep and tiredness dominate my life more than any other Sims life based requirement (with the possible exception of bladder).

This weekend we will be able to catch up on some of the lost hours (and I know that Sleep-debt is a myth) but this will be offset by a later bedtime, but this weekend I’ll be able to regress to being a teenager again.

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Dreaming of my bed

In which I look forward to crawling into bed.

I’ve reached that strange place I like to call “rested”, for the past few weeks I have felt like my sleep has been decimated by illness and child. Now that my sleep is back to normal I feel I should celebrate by dedicating a whole week to the wonderful world of slumber. What better place to start than my bed.

Bed (n.) Most important piece of furniture

This is my bed.

Double bed in a bedroom


I love my bed, it’s where I go to sleep. Or should I say try to sleep as often it is not possible. It’s not been possible for a while due to the hot (but not as hot as New York) weather we’ve been having here so I’m really missing the comforting embrace of my mattress. Instead I’ve been sleeping with my mistress in the other bedroom.

Continue reading “Dreaming of my bed”