What I’d tell him

I know he knows, I can see it when he looks at me. He’ll smile and just carry on regardless pretending that whatever I send was some form of incomprehensible nonsense. I’m not the only one, when anyone else talks to him they just get a look as if to say non comprende monsieur.

Such is life with a one year old, it’s like living in a foreign land in your own home. Simple instructions fall on deaf ears, but at the same time utter one word you shouldn’t have then you are living in fear that will be the one they learn to enunciate.

The A-Rex is so close to being full on conversive (he is moving from the puppy to the parrot stage) and there is still so much we need to tell him.

  • Do eat vegetables, don’t just eat meat
  • Don’t look at what Daddy is eating, just eat your vegetables
  • Don’t chew that, it’s electric
  • Don’t chew that, it’s plastic
  • Don’t chew that, it’s your Grandma
  • Stop
  • We only tell you stop when it’s dangerous
  • You are free to go anywhere where it’s not dangerous
  • You are free to be whoever you want if it’s not dangerous
  • You are free to do whatever you like if it’s not dangerous
  • That’s dangerous
  • Can you put that back please?
  • Thank you for putting that back.
  • Where did you get it from?
  • All you have to do to make us smile is smile
  • Do you know the effect your smile has on us?
  • Why do you insist on putting mushrooms in my imaginary tea?
  • Is that your way of dealing with taxation without representation?
  • Sausage or chips?
  • Daddy or chips?
  • Daddy or sausage?

You know I am proud of you, even when you somehow take of your PJ’s and nappy in bed

Published by Geek Ergo Sum

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3 Comments

  1. It’s an interesting list of do’s and don’ts, do you repeat this every day or do you expect him to remember? You know children they’re used to saying, I’m sorry I forgot. Do you have some kind of system about things you tell your kids. Don’t mind if I say; it sounds funny. I taught kids for many moons, they are capable of outsmarting adults. 🙂

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    1. Every day…it feels like every hour! I find I have to do a lot of making eye contact to try and seer the instructions onto their retinas. Despite this I often think I am doing it for my own benefit, and have had to get over the annoyance of repeating myself.

      Like

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