Time is a strange concept, hours linger while the day flies by. A month is over in a sneeze, but a year goes forward slowly but speeds up when looking back. A calendar seems to be subject to the chronological Doppler effect, with the high pitched whine of the past echoing into the distance.
So it comes to pass that I have another birthday, but birthdays seem different now. For a start I get a card from my offspring. Getting a card with “Daddy” on is a present in itself.
What makes this quite satisfying is that I found an old post from a couple of years ago that had the following:
So here’s to looking forward to a future birthday, to when I am 40, by which time I hope to be in a job I love, be married and have kids, in a nice house by the sea.
In the space of a few years my life has changed considerably, as it always has seemed to do.
Looking back at my younger self a lot has happened:
- Moved house three times
- Had six different cars
- Thirteen different jobs
- Been to numerous places around the world
- Got married
- Had a baby
- Had another baby
- Mentally, and arguably scientifically (the human body will have replaced the majority of the cells in your body over the last decade) I am a different person.
In the last decade years my life has become more digital, now when I wake up the first thing I do is check my email, Facebook and Twitter. I am certainly more connected than my younger self, when I was young you either had to phone someone (on a land line as they may not have a mobile) or try to find out if they were on IM somewhere.
In most aspects I am better than I was a decade ago, I am more knowledgeable and have better skills. I’ve made some good friend over the years, and lost a few on the way. I’ve gone through periods of gloom, in fact three years ago I wrote:
The one part of my younger year old self I do miss is the optimism I had back then. I imagined by now to be in a job I loved, be married and have kids, in a nice house by the sea. Whether it is as a result of getting older, or just the events of recent years, I am certainly a bit more pessimistic than I used to be. Where I would look for the good in every situation I know imagine what could go wrong. As I ‘celebrate’ (I am past the point where I am excited by the passing of one more year) another birthday I do think that looking back is not the right way to go.
Which brings me back to my initial dream of 40, a promise I made when I was in life’s trough, for major changes in my life. I can quite easily lay claim to completing two of them, as the cards titled “Husband” and “Daddy” will testify, and part of the way to loving my job.
All that I need to work on is the sea-front residence, maybe that’s what is in the wrapping paper?