The bachelor bucket list

In which I get it all out of my system before I get married.

Me in front of a sign saying plan ahead

Tonight is the last night for a week where I have parental responsibility, the Feliciraptor will be spending a few nights at Grandma G’s and then she and Mrs G are off to Berlin for a few days leaving me all on my lonesome. It will be the first time for nearly two years that I will be able to relive the bachelor lifestyle.

At first I was at a loss as to what I could do, I am so used to spending my time with the pair, then I remembered that somewhere I had written a “bucket list” about what I aimed to achieve in my last days of being a singleton before Mrs G moved across an ocean to be with me.

At the time I thought I would miss the being on my own (I had got used to it) so this will be a chance to relive those days.

My bachelor bucket list.

  • Wake up when I want to. (This is now dictated by the Feliciraptor alarm)
  • Announce the morning with a bottom bugle call. (Still do)
  • Have a wash without searching through all the girly soaps and creams. (I need to find somewhere to put these)
  • Be able to use the shower without knocking over a hundred kinds of shampoo and conditioner. (Solved this by buying Mrs G a shower basket)
  • Spend an hour on the toilet reading. (Now I can only manage 45 minutes).
  • Be able to use the toilet when I want (as there is nobody sat on it reading). (I mended the outside toilet so I can do this anytime I want…in the Summer)
  • Leave the toilet seat lid up, every time I go in there I have to lift the lid up, how many times do we men have to tell you.  (Now we have to close it to make sure the Feliciraptor doesn’t get her head stuck in the bowl)
  • Sit on the sofa and switch the sport on without worrying that we were meant to go out for cushions. (To be fair to Mrs G I am sitting watching the cricket while writing this)
  • Sit and watch sport without being told “what more sport” as I proceed to watch cricket/rugby/football/F1/tennis/Tour De France/Ryder Cup etc. (I am allowed to watch 50% of these sports without complaint)
  • Eat nothing but meats and starch, and only using tomato sauce as part of my five a day. (Poor Mrs G, she is still trying but this is the basis of my diet)
  • Play computer games while watching sport. (I can get away with this when Mrs G just needs noise while she is marking all the schoolwork she has)
  • Watch TV shows without explaining every situation, especially if the question is due to be answered in 30 seconds. (This)
  • Write a blog post. (Well this year I am well on track with this)
  • Not keep my phone on waiting for a Skype call. (I may be getting reacquainted with this over the next few days).
  • Do the clothes washing on the same setting for everything. (As I do the laundry I make a concession for darks/not-that-dark)
  • Iron everything on the same heat. (Ha! Iron!)
  • Organise everything in the flat how I like. Whether its books, DVDs or remote controls. (There may be an organisation programme in place for when Mrs G is gone…she won’t be happy)
  • Own the remote control. (I can count four different machines by my right hand)
  • Go to bed when I’m tired. (No. THIS)
  • Sleep in the middle of the bed and have all the duvet. (I’ve been practising and it just feels weird)
  • Keep the windows and doors closed to stop the pollen/vampires getting in. (Mrs G has caved in on this, she can’t deal with the moaning)
  • Snore. (She doesn’t mind)

The interesting thing about this list (that was written back in 2012) is how much of my life at that time has both changed and stayed the same. I have the addition of two special ladies to my life, but I can still be the same person I was. The threat of a child erasing your personality seems to have been as real as the Y2K bug.

The only way my life has changed is that it has become richer, I may not spend as much time gaming or watching TV but I don’t miss it. I find I am more focused on doing the activities I want to do and enjoy rather than just time-wasting. Sometimes I do think about what my life would be if I was still a bachelor, but it never seems as good as the life I have now.

The final item on the bachelor bucket list, I think it explains why I am happy those days no longer linger.

  • Not be soppy or loved up…there’s plenty of time for that in the future.

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Linger.”

Tell us about times in which you linger — when you don’t want an event, or a day to end. What is it you love about these times? Why do you wish you could linger forever?

Author: geekergosum

Ah, so you worked out the riddle. You just needed to use dwarfish and the doors to Geek Ergo Sum opened. Or perhaps you just used Google. Either way you are here, on my little corner of the Internet.

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